Waste of a day
Today was such a waste of a day. The morning was like diabetes clinic, man i feel like i eat way less than wat the other pple eat!! But it was boring and so we went to do suturing on pigskin instead. I think i improved since the other day i did it - much better this time, i didnt' bend or break the needle.
Afternoon was stupid. I just hanged ard with the nurses. Gave this guy his Hepatitis B injection. Tried to take blood off this woman. I mean i was confident in all, she was thin and i could see and feel her veins. But somehow, me being clumsy and unco, i went in, saw the flashback of blood, but then fiddled ard trying to get the collection tube in, the needle popped out of the skin!! And i could hear this suction sound. so had to pull the needle out completely. The woman was like aching in pain. She was like moaning and i felt real shit. Then she complained that she couldn't feel her arm and her arm felt cold. The nurse got really worried. We then applied cold pack to her arm. The nurse then tried the other arm but the vein collapsed after she put the needle in so she didn't succeed either, altho she blames it on the woman being a bit "shocked" and vasoconstricted. Then the woman continued to be in pain. The nurse was real worried, and wanted the doc to look at her arm. So i went to ask him and he didn't care - cos he said it was a normal reaction to the tourniquet. So I told the nurse that and she was furious. After a while that woman calmed down and i looked at the puncture site again, seemed like there's probably gonna be a bruise there in a few days. Whoops. I felt bad. The nurse then told me off, telling me "never to do something i m not confident of". That kinda pissed me off too - i mean i KNOW i'm prone to mistakes because i'm just starting to learn how to do this - and besides,without making mistakes, how else can i learn!? I felt shit tho - imagine if i was that woman and it really was that painful. I just felt real bad. And it was a easy one too, i think, and i stuffed up. And i stuffed up all my other blood tests before this as well - i can't remember when the last time i was successful in taking blood was. I've totally lost my confidence in doing these things. Actually scared now. =(
Me and Vid are gona practice taking blood off each other 2mr, hopefully i can get it and get my confidence back???? And the other thing is that i hate needles myself anyway - and i'm doing this to other people...
So it was crap for the rest of the day. Oh, and i have really bad timemanagement skills. Vid can cook dinner, study cardio, go to uni to look up stuff for her presentation today (mine was crap and boring,the docs weren't really interested in Entamoeba Histolytica, the reg beside me said "oh that was interesting" jus to make me feel better =(( not that it maters cos it doesn't count) came home, walked to supermarket to get toothpaste, and went to sleep by 11pm. Man!!! by 11pm I was like just starting to study! and do my research! i m SO inefficient!!
You know, even tho the bloodtest was such a small thing, probalby in ur eyes, but the fact that i caused damage to people and they are suffering right in front of me makes me feel really really bad. Reminds me of that episode in scrubs - where turk accidentally damaged the brachial plexus (arm nerves) of this pianist in training in surgery without knowing that he's an aspiring pianist - and the guilt...(cos nerves take ages to recover and you mite still get some weakeness even after you recover)
What if i kill someone in the future!? i'm a failure at even such a small procedure that even IV drug users are professional at...and i'm failing and failing like probably 5X in a row now...
And i'm not even complaining about doing IV lines yet...
Oh shit Anaesthestics is next run....maybe they'll shape me into a better blood taker/IV line inserter....><"
You know the music i've been putting up on this site? IT all comes from the best game + storyline i've played. Yes emotionally this storyline beats, to me, all the FF series (yes even ff10)...its awesome. It suffices to say if there's something that will put me to tears rite now, that game is probably the best shot. *sooob*
BUt i think there r a few people out there that are potential players...i shouldn't ruin if for you should i??
Or should i do a spoliers alert?
Afternoon was stupid. I just hanged ard with the nurses. Gave this guy his Hepatitis B injection. Tried to take blood off this woman. I mean i was confident in all, she was thin and i could see and feel her veins. But somehow, me being clumsy and unco, i went in, saw the flashback of blood, but then fiddled ard trying to get the collection tube in, the needle popped out of the skin!! And i could hear this suction sound. so had to pull the needle out completely. The woman was like aching in pain. She was like moaning and i felt real shit. Then she complained that she couldn't feel her arm and her arm felt cold. The nurse got really worried. We then applied cold pack to her arm. The nurse then tried the other arm but the vein collapsed after she put the needle in so she didn't succeed either, altho she blames it on the woman being a bit "shocked" and vasoconstricted. Then the woman continued to be in pain. The nurse was real worried, and wanted the doc to look at her arm. So i went to ask him and he didn't care - cos he said it was a normal reaction to the tourniquet. So I told the nurse that and she was furious. After a while that woman calmed down and i looked at the puncture site again, seemed like there's probably gonna be a bruise there in a few days. Whoops. I felt bad. The nurse then told me off, telling me "never to do something i m not confident of". That kinda pissed me off too - i mean i KNOW i'm prone to mistakes because i'm just starting to learn how to do this - and besides,without making mistakes, how else can i learn!? I felt shit tho - imagine if i was that woman and it really was that painful. I just felt real bad. And it was a easy one too, i think, and i stuffed up. And i stuffed up all my other blood tests before this as well - i can't remember when the last time i was successful in taking blood was. I've totally lost my confidence in doing these things. Actually scared now. =(
Me and Vid are gona practice taking blood off each other 2mr, hopefully i can get it and get my confidence back???? And the other thing is that i hate needles myself anyway - and i'm doing this to other people...
So it was crap for the rest of the day. Oh, and i have really bad timemanagement skills. Vid can cook dinner, study cardio, go to uni to look up stuff for her presentation today (mine was crap and boring,the docs weren't really interested in Entamoeba Histolytica, the reg beside me said "oh that was interesting" jus to make me feel better =(( not that it maters cos it doesn't count) came home, walked to supermarket to get toothpaste, and went to sleep by 11pm. Man!!! by 11pm I was like just starting to study! and do my research! i m SO inefficient!!
You know, even tho the bloodtest was such a small thing, probalby in ur eyes, but the fact that i caused damage to people and they are suffering right in front of me makes me feel really really bad. Reminds me of that episode in scrubs - where turk accidentally damaged the brachial plexus (arm nerves) of this pianist in training in surgery without knowing that he's an aspiring pianist - and the guilt...(cos nerves take ages to recover and you mite still get some weakeness even after you recover)
What if i kill someone in the future!? i'm a failure at even such a small procedure that even IV drug users are professional at...and i'm failing and failing like probably 5X in a row now...
And i'm not even complaining about doing IV lines yet...
Oh shit Anaesthestics is next run....maybe they'll shape me into a better blood taker/IV line inserter....><"
You know the music i've been putting up on this site? IT all comes from the best game + storyline i've played. Yes emotionally this storyline beats, to me, all the FF series (yes even ff10)...its awesome. It suffices to say if there's something that will put me to tears rite now, that game is probably the best shot. *sooob*
BUt i think there r a few people out there that are potential players...i shouldn't ruin if for you should i??
Or should i do a spoliers alert?
Hey Moo, I mean it's probably no point saying it's part of the learning exp since you know it all anyway, but let me tell u some exp of my own.
ReplyDeleteIt's Simon la, just incase if you wonder. It took me so many rats before I can mount the aorta onto a cannula. And this is not the worst part. Sometime the rat wouldn't go to sleep (I used anesthetics to kill the rat), probably because I didn't inject into the right place, I was forced to start the dissection even though there was still some reflex, otherwise the anesthetics may do something funny to the heart and the experiment would be stuffed and then I would waste a rat life for nothing. But I knew the rat could feel the pain when I cut, cos I could see a sudden increase in heart rate and the respiratory muscles contracted like mad as I cut through the rib. May be i should wait for longer no matter what, but then I would waste more rats in the future, so do u think I should cut or not?
We all face shits like this from time to time la, just hope they don't happen too often. Man I should be writting my thesis now, but feel kinda sick all the time these days. Hey what r u up to now, still in Auckland?